We all do it. Pop into a shop for toothpaste, walk out with candles, snacks and a jumper we didn’t plan to buy. It is easy to laugh it off, but there is more going on beneath the surface than weak willpower.
The way we spend money is tangled up with emotion, habit and even brain chemistry, and once you understand it, you can take back control.
That tiny spark of excitement when you tap your card? That is dopamine, the brain chemical that rewards you for doing something it thinks feels good. The buzz often kicks in before we buy, which explains why browsing online can feel just as satisfying as actually owning something.
The trouble is that high fades fast. Emotional spending is our way of chasing it again, especially after a tough day, a row with a partner or a long week at work. Keeping a small spending diary can help you spot when you are buying to feel better, rather than because you actually need something.
Our spending decisions seem independent. In reality, they are influenced by what is around us. Friends booking holidays, influencers showing off “must-haves”, adverts promising we will be happier if we just add to the basket. It is all designed to push emotional buttons.
This “herd spending” is one reason so many people struggle to save money. We compare, copy and convince ourselves we can afford it. But here is the truth: most people are winging it financially. Stepping back from the noise or unfollowing the worst offenders can do wonders for your well-being and your bank balance.
Our spending habits say more about us than we realise. For some, it is about comfort or control. For others, it is about showing love or status. When people feel anxious or powerless, they are more likely to spend. Buying gives us a brief sense of security until the bill lands in our bank account.
Next time you are tempted, pause. Ask yourself what feeling you are really chasing: excitement, calm, pride, belonging? Understanding those emotional triggers is the first step towards better financial decisions and a calmer financial future.
You don’t need to ban spending altogether, just make it more intentional. Try setting aside separate pots for bills, goals and treats. It turns vague “I should save more” plans into something you can actually track.
If you are someone who buys on impulse, give yourself a bit of breathing room. Walk away, close the tab, sleep on it. By the next day, you will often realise you didn’t want it that much after all. When you do decide to spend, make it count. Pick things that add real comfort, make daily life easier or bring you closer to the people you care about. Those are the moments that actually feel good, far more than the quick thrill of another parcel showing up at your door.
Can money buy happiness? Sometimes, but not in the way portrayed by marketing. People who spend on experiences or are generous towards others often feel better about the money they spent than those who just buy stuff. Spending a weekend with friends or donating to something that matters helps to create lasting well-being, because it builds real connections.
Once you start noticing what drives your spending behaviour, you can make small changes that quietly transform your financial situation. The goal is not to stop spending, it is to spend with purpose, save for your future and build a sense of control that no impulse purchase can match.
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